at last . . .

Last month i had the opportunity to visit a place called The Wave... just north of the grand canyon... basically right smack-dab on the az/utah border. Some friends and I stayed for a weekend in a wilderness area of paria canyon/vermillion cliffs national park.

The trip could not have been at a better time in my life. Just another reason to thank God for his hand in my life. With my head full of questions and a brokenheart, I had the most amazing experience with the lord.

It was very personal to me and Im not going to go into much detail, but the first hike we made was in this area called Buckskin Gulch. Here is a great picture taken by one of my friends. Little did she know she was documenting an amazing conversation....

if you look toward the left side & center of the page you can see me sitting up on a cliff.... I so badly wanted to get away from the group while we were exploring the canyon, and i had finally gotten a chance.... it was weird once i sat down and was completely alone... the tears just began to fall non-stop, but for some reason i felt completely calm... i felt a very comforting presence all around me. it was such a beautiful view...... so vast that it made my life and my problems seem small and pointless..... its strange how it took a 6-hour drive and a trek to the middle of nowhere to be reminded that he is always with me....

the last day before we set out to hike, i had some more time alone at the campsite. i just wanted to pray and thank god for the day before.... but he had other things in mind. i had my ipod and was just letting the songs play at random..... while i was praying he just decided to reveal a lot of things to me about my life and my situations.... some not so great to have to face.... of all the things he showed me that morning i just wanted to share the one that meant the most:

He did create those canyons, caused the prehistoric volcanoes and all the processes that produced such an amazing landscape.... beauty beyond describing... but that same awesome power created every part of me! I am just as amazing as what I was experiencing that whole weekend. All the beauty that I saw in the mountains, cliffs, and canyons.... that same beauty is woven through-out me. All of nature is just a reflection of God but I seem to set myself apart from that....me... small, insignifigant, doubting, and worrisome me. Until I truely understand and ACCEPT that truth.... I will not be happy and I cannot grow.

I cant even begin to describe how the need for that truth has been present in my life for YEARS. YEARS. And I am just getting it now.... and the fact that it was revealed to me then (as in last month) has already transformed my life and is helping me today, as more life situations have made themselves present.

Here are some other photos of the trek :) sorry for the sideways one.... i hate windows vista.